Are You A Scissoring Sister? Learn how to Scissor "Any Which Way".

Are You A Scissoring Sister?

There’s no doubt that any conversation around scissoring is going to include some bewilderment. Some people think it’s a myth and those that have dispelled that myth for themselves are exasperated that someone could be missing out on what could be the best orgasm of their life. Some folks are super turned off by the mechanics or politics around it while the folks who still don’t know what it is, exactly, stare in horror that they have no idea what is going on. And they all aren’t wrong.

Scissoring has many meanings and the definition you get depends on who you ask. The definition of the word has changed significantly over time and as we become more accepting of the various and fluid identities and orientations around us, how we understand what scissoring means continues to evolve.

What exactly is “Scissoring”?

Ask a frat boy, and he’s likely to tell you that it’s what all lesbians do when having sex, and he knows that because he has seen it on every “lesbian” porn, ever. He’s probably even done the four-finger scissor thing around suspected lesbians. Cue the eye roll. Interestingly, if you ask a lesbian, chances are they’ll tell you they either don’t engage because of how much work it is, or they don’t think it’s a real thing at all, to begin with. That’s due, in part, to the aforementioned frat boy. 

Many lesbians think that “scissoring” is borne of the imagination of a male porn director. They believe it’s for the male gaze and doesn’t work in real life. Again, they aren’t wrong. If you look up scissoring on any porn site, you’ll see impossibly unsustainable positions consisting of tangled legs and pelvic bruises waiting to happen. And many MANY men look this up. For this reason, a lot of women who love women dismiss the legend of the scissors as a male phantasmic myth, but some of them give it a go. For the ones that are able to make it work, they seem to have rave reviews. Unfortunately, even though only some lesbians scissor sometimes, media and porn have led men to think that it is the main and only sex act for lesbians. It’s not. Not even almost. Some lesbians don’t believe it’s a thing, and some have tried it and don’t like it. Some actually can’t at all, so it isn’t the defining position of lesbian sex, by far.

Tribadism

Here’s the thing. Tribadism is understood to be a lesbian act. Because tribadism is defined as two vulvas rubbing together, while scissoring is just a position used to get these two vulvas together, there is a large acceptance of the idea that scissoring is for anyone regardless of genitalia. 

Keep in mind that not everyone with a vulva is a woman, and not all women have vulvas. Additionally, lesbian identity is inclusive of trans and nonbinary folks, so whether someone defines tribadism as “lesbian” or “vulva-to-vulva” leaves some room for interpretation. Many people conflate tribbing and scissoring, but tribbing is the act. Scissoring is the position. In this way, scissoring is tribbing, but tribbing is only sometimes classified as scissoring. 

The point is, rubbing your pussy on anything can feel really, REALLY, good. Rubbing against any part of your partner’s body can have an added element of intimacy but when you rub pussies together, it opens up a whole new world.

Smush, Slide, and Scissor

Before you go smashing your smushy with your fave, there are a few things you should know and do. First, you’re going to want to loosen those muscles by any means necessary. Stretching, yoga, pilates. Any kind of hip openers will do the trick. Also helpful is a nice hot shower to help you and your muscles relax. 

Speaking of cleaning up, pay attention to your hair down there. Sliding across stubble doesn’t feel nice, and too much fur on your burger could cause chafing. Next, lube up. This can’t be stressed enough. The more slip you drip, the more you slide when you collide. Not only does this help the already good feeling become great, but it protects against chafing. Natural lube is great, but because it comes from the vaginal canal which is internal, it doesn’t cover the vulva which gets the most contact. A water-based lubricant is going to be your best bet here. Just make sure to stay away from the flavored lubes. Flavored lubes could upset your pH balance and cause all kinds of unsexy problems. 

Variety is the Spice of the Scissor

There are several positions for scissoring. The main one is a classic, and generally what people see in movies or in porn. One partner lies on their side, and the other on their back so that their vulvas meet. The second well-known position is where one person lies on their side, leaning back. Partner 2 straddles them so that they are on their knees with Partner 1’s leg under them. Partner 1’s other leg can go over Partner 2’s shoulder or wherever feels most comfortable. Pillows are super helpful for positioning and support in both of these scenarios. The lube will help you glide across each other nicely. For a little extra buzz, try putting a vibrator between you. This is extra helpful if you’re having trouble getting your vulvas to “connect”. The Together Couple’s Vibrator with remote control is perfect for scissoring. To enhance this already intimate move, the Echo Function of the Together Vibe allows you to stay in tune with your partner’s arousal, changing vibrational intensity to match their arousal so you can feel when they reach orgasm.

Just remember that each body is unique and every scissoring experience will be different. There’s nothing exact about the position examples above. Because some vulvas sit more to the front, and others are centered directly between the legs, some positions may work better than others. Even then, you would still need to adjust the position to better suit you and your partner, and just because something worked the first time doesn’t mean it will work every other time. That works the other way around, too. Just because it hasn’t worked the first couple of times you tried it, doesn’t mean it never will. If you really want to see what the fuss is about, don’t be afraid to give it more than one shot.

Safety First

Something else to keep in mind about scissoring is that there will be direct genital-to-genital contact, as well as an exchange of fluids. That means that it’s possible to pass on STIs. Herpes, warts, chlamydia, and gonorrhea are all passable through vulva-to-vulva contact. You can also pass along trichomoniasis or thrush. Even after you’ve both tested clean, you can still contract bacterial vaginosis if your pH is not aligned with your partner. To prevent these unfortunate occurrences, use a dental dam and get tested often, especially if you and your partner aren’t monogamous.

Even with all of that, proponents of humping the bump say the juice is definitely worth the squeeze and that the rewards make it so worth it. The clit is a very small target for two people to try to align, but the good news is that the button we all know and love is a LOT bigger than we can see. In the midst of all that rubbing and humping, the bigger clitoral organ is being stimulated, contributing to what will, no doubt, be a HUGE orgasm. So don’t be afraid to start thrustin’ your lustin’. Soon you will be bustin’ in the best of ways.